12 Days of Blogmas: My Letter to Santa

'On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, the first in a blogmas series!'

Hello everyone, today is the first of my twelve blogmas posts and I am so excited for you to read the posts in this series. This is my first time trying blogmas and I am really proud that I am managing to get posts out.

As it is my first post I thought I needed to write something that would be interesting to read. I am going to assume the last time any of you wrote a letter to Santa was quite a few years back, and I think some of my requests may be pretty relatable. So here goes:

Dear Father Christmas, Sir,

I know there is some unwritten rule that Christmas is reserved for children, but there are some things I would really like this year. Given I am a devout lover of Peter Pan, I hope you can accept my desire to never grow up, and with that, give my letter a little peruse, if only for your own amusement.

I would like to begin by apologising for stopping my belief in you. It seems that there is another unwritten rule in life, that adults must fill children with fantasy, force them to believe in something and then crush it (I think it's about shaping their personality or something) but given the absolute arse of a year that 2016 was, I need to believe in some kind of miracle, so here I am, writing to you.

Given that your home is in a state of climate emergency, I would like my first gift to be for humans to just stop wrecking the world before there's nothing left of it. Soon you'll be replacing your cosy red and white suit for a mankini, and that really isn't selling Christmas for me. Could you please build a snow globe around the polar bears and keep them safe? Soon, The Polar Express and all other snowy, wintery, Christmas classics will be ancient, a little miniscule artifact for historians, and we will be watching 'Sunburnt Santa is Coming to Town.'

Adding on to this point of humans being very talented at creating chaos in the world, could you please put a mute button on Donald Trump for just one day in 2017? I sure hope he is the winning candidate to be the spokesperson for your naughty list! Furthermore, could you just put all homophobes, transphobes, sexists, liars, racists, and any other isms and ists, in some kind of 'naughty list permanency' for future Christmases to come?

I know you may have debated placing me on your nice list because my job turns me into some kind of non-believer in all things holy. But if you were to abolish this notion that Christmas is about food and presents and shopping until unholy hours at night and Christmas Eve and Boxing Day, I promise to never stop believing in you again. Honestly. Nothing says festivity more than spending more time at work than with your family in December *eye roll.*

Here are some other, non compulsory, but much wished for ideas I have for my Christmas gifts this year:

• To not hear the word 'Kardashian/Jenner' for at least three months in 2017
• Train delays and cancellations to face their own cancellations
• People at concerts to use their phones less
• Financial Stability
• Reassurance that Millennial's can make it on the housing ladder
• Less Primark Hauls on YouTube
• People to stop asking me 'what are you doing?' when it comes to my future
• My brain to feel less sad
• Cheaper long haul flights
• People to stop abusing animals who are so smol
• A life supply of mozzarella sticks

I am sure these are all of my requests. Given that I a) graduated from university b) spent an entire year without a dog and c) did not punch anyone in the throat, I hope you take my preferred gift ideas into consideration. Thank you for taking the time to read this letter. My budget is kind of tight so I only have Asda Value cookies to accompany this letter but I am sure you will enjoy them.

I look forward to seeing which of my dreams come true on December 25th. Have a safe journey across the world in less than 12 hours,

love, Aimee :) xx